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My Story...
Hi I’m Alex and I’m a marine engineer, while working out in the Caribbean in 2006 during some leisure time I went swimming and my whole life changed in an instant... I hit my head on a sand bank and broke my neck. The vertebrae at c5 fractured and c6 broke into three parts one of which damaged my spinal cord, leaving me paralysed from the chest down. Is Buying Valium Online Illegal Australia
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my life is going down hill everyday….  Chair batteries are really weak.. Wimpy fields are newly plow’d so no access, bed mobility is nearly zero! Can’t adjust in bed, the carer hasn’t delt with someone as large as me! Can’t shift my hips or remove creases in sheets… I have pretty much lost all slide board transfers, haven’t done my bike in nearly two months…. I updated my iPad and it wiped everything, so lost everything.. Just another kick and stamp on my balls, feeling useless and frustrated beyond belief – going to go back on antidepressants to be drugged up for the foreseeable future

I’ve gone from “alexwillwalkagain” to “alexjustneedstobecomfortableinbed”

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Buy Herbal ValiumBe true to yourself, you are the one living as you are, from waking each morning to laying your head in the evening, what you do.. Who you truly are is up to you, to change, build, evolve or adapt… You won’t achieve anything until you break all that you are today right down. I may never be all that I want to be….

But I can try

“Everything came from nothing” (Stephen Hawkins)

“It can take a life time to come to terms with some things…”
(TV advert)

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I’ll be back maybe tonight… Maybe next year.. When I feel I’m “pro active”

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Believe in who you want to be, adapt, evolve and continue!

I am nothing, own nothing, can’t do anything….
(Truth and reality)

I can be anything as everything comes from nothing, it’s just depressing and soul destroying starting over always.. But unlike others looking in job centres or avoiding them in a lot of cases, I start from being unable to role/move or get out of bed, unable to sit up correctly in a profiling bed (hinging at my ribs instead of waist)

Two days in from being kicked square in the balls yet again, thru shear frustration and a little thought process (from hours uncomfortably awake) I can now sit up/pull myself up (using a rope ladder, bed mechanisum and side bars), even though being knocked back I bounce back quick – I don’t bounce in the literal sense… I still hit the floor like a sack of $#|+…

Even my plants were all dying, but clearing out the dead ones found that four mango trees and my pineapple are growing.

There has to be some reason that I didn’t die that day, a lot of people worked hard to bring me back so.. Right now today I feel happy with basic bed mobility and another blank slate to try

Lose everything, have nothing and regain a lust for living..

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Indian Valium OnlineBelief in the seemingly impossible…

My mind is struggling to deal with being forced backwards at every turn, I am finding things difficult right now (this whole year..), you get to a “fuck walking I just want my independence stage…..”

I don’t know how to say that politely..

I haven’t done my bike… Or much else productive these past few weeks, frustration is my best friend now, when do you get to that part of the day when everything is going wrong, then you think.. “I know I feel like being strapped onto a machine and electrocuted for two hours!?” (My bike)

The night before last was like being brought back 7 years.. Unable to do…. Anything, last night I slept like the dead! (A good night)

My bed designed and given to elderly and infirm, paralysed and bed ridden….? I looked at it this morning once HOISTING out (slide board transfers (out), not possible – due to design.. My body bends at the hip…? As I’m sure every other human on this planet! Why then does my bed hinge at the point of my ribs?? Pushing me down every time is it up, with no way of being able to push myself up??

This takes out most bed mobility.. Then the side (baby bars) get taken down to “get out of bed” (hoist/slide/or fall!!) I need these to hook my gimpy arms thru?? To turn alone is impossible being paralysed from the nipples down! I utilise what I have to do what I need!

Achieving a lot “making the impossible possible” over these past few years waiting for everything EVERYTHING! And saying thank you for everything all day long for everything all the time.. Even down to inserting suppositories and then proceeding to “stimulate” my bowel (“digital stimulation”), the first time I cried was in Miami.. Transferring from ICU after two days into rehab, I knew things were serious (being paralysed), I just thought.. 4/6 months.. Maybe a year then back to work.. Back to my life… Nope – a video on bowel management and “this is you now” – it’s what I go through… So if your reading this… Your interested…. (Sorry) – a finger in your butt then thanking the person!? Before that would result in fighting talk! (Polite version)

All summer I’ve been without my boma chair due to the most expensive part breaking.. At a cost of £240…. The complete chair costing a little over £10,000….!!!!!!!!! Those two parts, a seat and four wheels attached to a frame??? How do you get to 10,000!!! (The cushion is £375 extra – that isn’t even the expensive one!(a j2 cushion).

All my stuff is extremely over priced.. It’s not one off buys either! I’m not getting up and about anytime soon, it will be 8 years this December! Everything bought (mostly funded by the very generous Holland America line, and helped in kind, money and time by my family and friends – THANK YOU)

I need extremely over priced things everyday all day, people can’t and don’t want to keep supplying and giving, everybody gets tired at some point… I am going to need things throughout the duration of my life.. Not toys.. But just to have a good nights sleep or “walk” the dog!

I am paralysed, I am continuing.. I am!

The night before last showed me how frustrating my life can be, giving up is not an option – my main goal is to live alone with my dog living independant, not needing to beg or grovel for anything, i need to be the man I was born to be not a pathetic waste of time and space that I see myself becoming… It’s a fight everyday for who I am on the inside

Find this guy on you tube – Bob Ross, happy cloud remix..

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I can only continue or die trying

Thank you for your time, thank you for your support

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At some point soon…..

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